Murgha of the Day: March 2006

Friday, March 31, 2006

New on the Endangered Species List !!

Courtesy: Time Magazine Catroon of the Week
- click on the image for the full-scale version.

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

International Defender of Murghas

The presence of deadly H5N1 strain of bird flu sparked widespread fear and rumors among the local public about the emergence of Bird Flu outbreak in Pakistan. Murghas all over the country came under suspicion and scrutiny by the public. Every head turned around when an innocent murgha dared to step out on the streets of Pakistan. Many murghas complained about the biased attitude of Pakistani people towards the entire murgha population due to the acts of few misguided murghas. But the public, widely engrossed into the media's biased coverage of the Bird Flu epidemic, did not pay any attention to the murghas and their supporters. Betrayal and depression settled in the murgha community as they were rejected by their own people. The situation took a deadly turn when the government officials mass-slaughtered around 23,000 chickens whose only fault was their presence around the suspected murghas involved in Bird Flu case.

Dismayed by the local attitudes, the murghas sent their high-ranking poultry farmers and lobbyists all the way to the Federal Information Minister, Sheikh Rashid Ahmed. On his insistence, the government conducted a sample testing of all the murghas with the help of World Health Organization (WHO) and managed to refute the rumors of Bird Flu outbreak in Pakistani murgha population.

Moreover, in a public show of support for the murghas, Sheikh Rashid Ahmed and other government officials got together and showed their solidarity with the Pakistani Murghas and declared that their consumption is perfectly safe. Sheikh Rashid Ahmed, willfully called upon the public to "display understanding towards chicken and ignore the rumors circulating in the media", while ensuring he maintained his lead over other officials in the hotly contested chicken eating competition. For his exemplary support towards the murghas, Sheikh Rashid Ahmed was later declared the "INTERNATIONAL DEFENDER OF MURGHAS" and received an All-you-can-eat coupon from the KFC employees union.

Tagged: Bird Flu , H51N , Pakistan

Friday, March 24, 2006

Bush and Mush

This hilarious video clip clearly summarizes the close relationship between Bush and Mush.

Monday, March 20, 2006

The Iraq Number Game

33710 : Iraqi civilians killed in Iraq

2318: US troops killed in Iraq

103: UK troops killed in Iraq

61: Journalists killed in Iraq

1: American President still refusing to acknowledge those numbers.

Question: How many more have to die before the President takes any responsibility?

Sources:
http://icasualties.org/oif/
http://www.iraqbodycount.org/

Tagged: Iraq , Iraq War , Bush

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Oops......... Bush Did it Again!!

With every passing day, President Bush and his administration is getting ready to prepare itself for yet another 'pre-emptive strike' on a sovereign and independent state in Middle East - Iran. Iran, previously only known for its expensive Persian rugs is also responsible for the existence of Queen's famous lead singer, Freddie Mercury. However, recently Iran has been making headline news around the hour for a very different set of reasons - a desire to develope nuclear technology and a desire to build nuclear reactors for 'civilan' use. However, those in the White House do not see at par with Iran's desires and have been forced to make use of the good old cold-war era threats.

All the bickering and threatening from the government officials seems uncannily familiar to the recent "liberation" of Iraq on the pre-text of Weapons of Mass Destruction(WMD). Almost as familiar and popular as Britney Spear's debut single, Oops... I did it Again. President Bush has seemingly learnt more Foreign Policy matters from Mrs. Spears than any other available resource. Absurd but provable argument, as evident from the Foreign Policy guidelines the President is advocating.

Following is the current administration's 10-week course guideline on foreign policy:

FOREIGN POLICY 101

Week 1: How to create a foreign catastrophe in order to divert citizens' attention from domestic political upheavals.
Week 2: Funding terrorist organizations in order to carry out the Global Agenda.
Week 3: If there is Oil, then they have the nukes.
Week 4: Destabilizing a Democratic but Unfriendly Country - an introduction.

Guest Lecture: Britney Spears on "Using 'Oops.. I did it Again' to your advantage."

Week 6: Using Media to sell the War.
Week 7: Ten Essentials of using Weapons of Mass Destruction for any invasion.
Week 8: Nuclear Proliferation - using it to your own advantage.
Week 9: Golden Rules of avoiding International Court of Justice in face of Prisoner Abuse Scandals.

Guest Lecture: Donald Rumsfeld on "Keeping it cool despite Demands for Resignation".

Week 11(optional): Creating a consensus at United Nations. *
Week 12(optional): Understanding the root causes of International Terrorism.*

* Note: None of the adminstration staff has yet attended these optional sessions.

Cross-posted at: Desicritics.org
Tagged : George Bush , Britney Spears , Bush

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Murgha Spring Collection 2006

Recently I came across this interesting website, where you can create a BLOG cloud from your site and get it printed on a T-shirt for around $ 22.00. Interesting idea, very entrepreneurial from the creator o f the site. If anyone's interested for any self-promotion, they can log into SnapShirts.com. They also have interesting T-shirts which have word cloud from the likes of Shakespeare and Dickens. Might make an interesting gift for Literature or History Majors.

This link was the courtesy of opinionatedinjerzee's blog.

Friday, March 10, 2006

From the Desk of Sheikh Mo , CEO - DP World

Dear Georgie,

I hope this letter finds you, your wife and Condi in the best of health. Allah-wa-Amin. I understand you just returned from your trip to Pakistan and India. I had been waiting for your holiday trip to get over. I did not want to disturb you while you were partying it hard with Mushy and Mani. Aren't they both adorable, esp. Mani. He is just so cute, just like a cuddly puppy. You should not have never frisked him at the airport, he is very harmless. Mushy called me the other day and didn't see too happy with the nuclear deal you just signed with India. Well, its between you and him but I think you should throw few F-16s at him just to keep him quite for now. International politics is not my cup of kehwah but it sure seems as interesting as a good Bollywood movie. That reminds me that they recently made a very good cartoon on an Indian God. I think you should check it out for since you adore cartoons. I am sure you will find it as entertaining as SpongeBob.

Now I must get to the point of sending this letter. Georgie, we all know how much you tried and worked for our American ports deal to get through but it seems the Congress is not in the mood for it. Hence, I am going to back off from this deal and transfer the interests to an American company. Of course, it will be an American company of our choice, perhaps Dick Cheney's Halliburton. Jazakallah, Congress still does not know how we control it through other Dubai-owned companies. Georgie, you don't have to worry about a single thing. I am not going to hold this against you at all. Mashallah, you have been a very good friend of ours and your always welcomed to stay at Burj-al-Arab's Buggs Bunny suite. We know how much you enjoyed it last time. Also, you don't have to worry about you dad's job at Carlyle Group. I have spoken to my cousin and have instructed him not to take any unnecessary steps.

Georgie, I just don't understand how your people could not see us as good people. Just like all American women are not as sexy as Jennifer Lopez, you should tell your people that all Arabs are not linked to terrorism. I have instructed my people to hire some American celebrities to carry out our PR job. Clinton and Madeline Albright have not done a good job at our PR. I think your people pay more attention to Entertainment Tonight, Extra and Hollywood Access than CNN and Fox News. Georgie, I think I am going to ask J-Lo to take care of this issue. She has been very nice and understanding so far, if you know what I mean ;)

However, Georgie, there is one thing that has been bothering me for the past few days and I was not sure how to bring it up with you. Georgie, as you had expressed your interests in working in Dubai after your presidency, I gave your resume to my HR Person. Unfortunately, according to HR, they have a very strict policy of hiring candidates with good educational credentials irrespective of their experience and political status. And your record is not that clear. Georgie, you are like a brother to me but I cannot do much in this area. You know we are trying to run our companies on WTO standards and practise complete accountability, the American way. Even my son is doing his MBA at University of California, San Diego so that he can work for DP World after me. You must understand my position. I hope you can enroll in a Masters program soon after your presidency and then there should not be a problem for you to get a job in Dubai, Inshallah.

Till then, may Allah bestow his blessings upon you and your family.

Fiamaan illaah

Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid al-Maktoum (Sheikh Mo)
CEO, Dubai Ports World

Cross-posted at: Desicritics.org
Tagged : George Bush , DP World , Dubai , Sheikh Mo

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Nuclear Proliferation among the Murghas

Here are some of the interesting remarks and conclusions that Western Politcal Cartoonists have drived after President Bush's recent visit to India and Pakistan:

- Please click on the images below to view a full-size cartoon.

Drew Sheneman, New Jersey -- The Newark Star Ledger, E-mail Drew.

Monte Wolverton, The Wolvertoon --Monte's work appears regularly in Mad Magazine - his editorial cartoon, The Wolvertoon, updates weekly - Visit Monte -- E-Mail Monte

Chip Bok, The Akron (Ohio) Beacon-JournalE-Mail Chip

Tagged : George Bush , India , Nuclear Proliferation

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

President Bush at Cricket Comedy Festival 2006

As Pakistan faced a severe shortage of comic acts on the cricket pitch, President Musharaf invoked the US Embassy in Islamabad to cater to this problem. As always, the Americans proved worthy of their mettle and called in for their best - President George W. Bush. The President entertained the small, yet selected, crowd with a comic performance that will surely replace Sidhu as the comedy King of cricket and put Bush right on top of it. A stellar performance, indeed. Enjoy the clip and pictures:

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Do Indians Also Hate President Bush?

ÃÂ© Khalil Bendib 2006. You can see more of Khalil Bendib's cartoons at www.bendib.com or order his book, It Became Necessary to Destroy the Planet in Order to Save It, from Plan Nine Publishing at www.plan9.org.

President Bush's current visit to India made headlines in the news circles not for the fact that its his first visit to the country or due to its strategic importance, but due to the protests carried out by thousands of people all across India. Protests are one common thing that always greet President Bush on every trip without exception. Be it Europe, Latin America or neighboring Canada or Mexico, protests and protests are all that welcome the leader of the 'free world' on his travels across the globe. Some protestors who travel from country to country in order to participate in every protests have starting boosting their accomplishments by 'Frequent Protester Miles' as oppose to Frequent Flyer Miles.

The strength of protest in India, around half a million people seemed to compete with the upcoming protests in Pakistan as President Bush heads towards Pakistan on Friday. Pakistani protestors have been pushed into hot waters with the huge numbers that Indian protestors pulled before and during President Bush's visit. To some it seems, India has already defeated Pakistan in this avenue as well, much like the ODI series earlier this year. Others say, that protests should be judged in per capita terms. India with a population of 1 billion could only produce half a million protestors, and Pakistani protestors claim that their strength in per capita terms would be higher with the smaller population size of Pakistan. Influence of a Prime Minister with a Finance background already seems to be rubbing off on to some common folks.

Why the protests in India? Americans, as confused as ever, are forced to wonder why would Indians protest. Don't they love us? It makes sense when Arab countries carry out radical protests, but why India? Is this not the country which is getting all the 'American' jobs and loves to imitate American accents and copy American names while innocent average Joes call them for lost baggage and technical support? In a true simplistic manner it would be understandable that the protests are being carried out by the Indian Muslims, as India is home to the second biggest Muslim population in the country. However, the protests are also being led by India's Dalit, Maoist and Communist leaders who see President Bush as the capitalist world's leader and a danger to their Indian identity and socialist system.

So why are they protesting with the Muslims? What happened to the India's communal riots where Muslims and Hindus were killing each other? Well, it seems that Hindus and Muslims might have some internal issues, however, they are very united against external forces that are bent on changing the things that they treasure most. As their love for Shahrukh Khan is universal all across India, so is their sentiments for President Bush. Some political pundits claim that the anti-globalization and communists groups in India are fueling these protests in the name of protecting Indian culture and identity. These groups are using the protests to highlight their concerns about the ill effects of outsourcing on the Indian culture, quite similar to the Right-Wing groups concerns with the jobs that are being exported out of America. However, others say that these groups only represent farmers and peasants and have nothing to do with urban centers, where the majority of Indian working population lives. Hence there are no double standards in India, where people would be protesting while sporting Calvin Klien and GAP T-shirts and hurling Nikes and Addidas at President Bush's effigies. A familiar picture from the protests in Middle East which loudly speaks about the double-standards that are at the very core of the problems being faced by the Muslim world.

In more interesting news, which may give few more Indians ample reason to protest President Bush's visits, it has been learnt that India's Prime Minister, Manmohan Singh, was briefly frisked by American security staff before he could greet President Bush. The media was kept out of sight and hence could not see the incident, but BJP Vice President, Mukhtar Abbas Naqvi, later told the media that it was an insult and humiliation for the nation to allow foreigners to check the Indian prime minister in his own land. BJP has vowed to bring this incident into the full attention of the public.

Similarly, one of New Delhi's most exclusive 5-star hotel, Le Meridien Hotel, had its own reason to protest President Bush's visit. The US Embassy, reportedly, booked 70 rooms in the hotel, with regards to President Bush's visit and the heavy entourage of security personnel. However, the hotel management was surprised to find that the rooms had been reserved for security dogs. US security personnel accompanying the sniffer dogs were offended when the management told them that dogs were not allowed on the hotel premises. The External Affairs Ministry was forced to intervene into the matter and assured the visiting American security staff that their security dogs will receive the same princely treatment that hotel bestows upon its other more "human" guests.

And then some people in American wonder, why everyone hates them?

Cross-posted at: Desicritics.org
Tagged : India , Protests , Bush , Globalization

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Mardi Gras' current murgha: FEMA

From: Time Magazine Cartoon of the Week Feb 19 - 25
- click on the image for the full-scale version.

Murgha of the Day